Sunday Service: Irrational Hope - Sunday December 7th, 2014

Irrational Hope

Reverend Tom Capo

Preached Sunday December 7th, 2014

I offer this poem by Vineet Bansal for your reflection:

What hope means

Hope is bright shining light which keeps darkness at bay

Hope is gentle cold breeze on a hot summer day

Hope is to remain positive when going gets tough

Hope is seeking more when others think you had enough

What hope means

Hope is dreaming of tomorrow

Hope is simmering under sorrow

Hope is sparkles when tears are in our eyes

Hope is a beautiful thing & beautiful things never die

What hope means

Hope is as light as a feather

Hope keeps all of us together

Hope is ubiquitous and free of cost

Hope is the last thing ever lost..... 

David McRaney in his book You are not so smart wrote:

    “The misconception: If you are in a bad situation, you will do whatever you can to escape it.  The truth: If you feel like you aren’t in control of your destiny, you will give up and accept whatever situation you are in.

    In 1965, a psychologist named Martin Seligman started shocking dogs.  He was trying to expand on the research of Pavlov—the guy who could make dogs salivate when they heard a bell ring.  Seligman wanted to head in the other direction, and when he rang his bell, instead of providing food, he zapped the dogs with electricity.  To keep them still, he restrained them in a harness during the experiment.  After they were conditioned, he put these dogs in a big box with a little fence dividing it into two halves.  He figured if [he] rang the bell, [the dog] would hop over the fence to escape, but it didn’t.  It just sat there and braced itself.  They decided to try shocking the dog after the bell.  The dog still sat there and took it.  When they put a dog in the box that had never been shocked before, or had previously been allowed to escape, and tried to zap it—it jumped the fence.  [McRaney asserts:]      You are just like these dogs…The leading theory as to how such a strange behavior would evolve is that it often springs from all organisms’ desire to conserve resources.  If you can’t escape a source of stress, it leads to more stress, and this positive feedback loop eventually triggers an autonomic shutdown.  At its most extreme, you think if you keep struggling you might die.  If you stop [struggling], there is a chance the bad thing will go away.”  

Sunday Service: Food and Religion - November 23st, 2014

Food and Religion

By Reverend Tom Capo

Preached on November 23, 2014

    What is the significance of food as it relates to spirituality or religious tradition?  In Steve’s story, little Carrie travels to different homes looking for her brother, but instead finds various cultural dishes made with rice.  Just like Carrie, I spent much of last week exploring the ways in which various religions include food in their rituals and traditions.  In this journey from virtual house to house, I was surprised by what I feasted upon.

    Our journey starts with the Sikh religious home. The Golden Temple Complex is the Central worship place for Sikhs around the world, and it is in Punjab, India.  The Sikhs are serving a free communal meal known as Langar.  The concept of `Langar' is a very old tradition of great importance for the Sikhs.  This tradition was started by the first Sikh Guru, Guru Nanak. It was designed to uphold the principle of equality between all people regardless of religion, caste, color, creed, age, gender or social status.  This was a revolutionary concept in the caste-ordered society of 16th century India where Sikhism began. In addition to the ideals of equality, the tradition of Langar expresses the ethics of sharing, community, inclusiveness and oneness of all humankind.

    Let’s now head to the Christian religious home.  I grew up Catholic and I felt I had some knowledge of this religion and food.  Communion.  The little wafer and a sip of wine that is given out in remembrance of Jesus Christ.   According to the Catholic faith, this wafer and wine is transubstantiated, actually becomes, the body and blood of Jesus Christ.  In Protestant Christian traditions, this wafer and wine is either though to be consubstantiated, that is, becoming the body and blood of Christ while still being wafer and wine, or is thought of more metaphorically, not actually changing.  The wafer and wine are used to remember Jesus, his wisdom and life.  But what is interesting to me is that this tradition of bread and wine didn’t really become part of the worship service in the Catholic Church until the time of Constantine around 313 CE.  

Spotlight on UU: Steve Connet

**Editor's note:  we took a break over the summer from our monthly spotlight.  Each month we ask congregant from DuPage Unitarian Universalist Church (DUUC) five questions and post their responses here on our blog.  We hope that old friends get to know each other better and new friends can find a friendly face when they visit!**

Spotlight on UU

Five Questions with DUUC Congregant Steve Connet

How did you find DuPage Unitarian Universalist Church? 

My parents were introduced to the church by a childhood friend of my moms.  I sort of came along for the ride.

What makes you keep coming back?

The feeling that other congregants are part of my family.

What has been your most memorable moment here?

I don't have a single memorable moment.
(Editor's note:  Steve may not want to commit to one single moment but he has been part of many memorable moments for the rest of us!  He is a friendly face, formidable Quiddler opponent and giver of incredible hugs!)

Where is your favorite spot to sit in the sanctuary? Why?

I haven't found "my spot" yet.  I find myself in the A/V loft more often than any other location.  At least in part because I enjoy seeing what is going on behind the scenes (on those days when I am not actually working there).

What are you currently participating at here at DUUC? 

I am currently on the A/V, Visitor Relations and Buildings Committees and also work as a Greeter.

Sunday Service: Those Who Are Homeless - October 12th, 2014

Those Who Are Homeless

Reverend Tom

10/12/2014

I have had many experiences with homeless people.  As I share some of them with you, I ask you to reflect on your experiences with people who are homeless.  

I was one of the initiators of a homeless emergency shelter program in Cedar Rapids called Family Promise.  I felt this was a vital program; it provides shelter for three intact families—meaning the father and male teenagers could join the rest of the family in the shelter, which is not the case in most homeless shelters—these three families would stay within church buildings at night and a day shelter during the day, if they were not at work or in school.  However, it wasn’t until I actually spent time with one homeless family in this program that I came to understand how being homeless profoundly affects a person.  I mean I knew from what I had read and what others had said to me, but my friends that is very different from actually spending time with someone who is homeless.  I brought a meal to a mother, her preteen daughter, and 6 year old son.  As we ate she talked about how she had a job but did not make enough money to buy a vehicle or rent an apartment.  She was trying to get a better job, and had hopes of leaving the Family Promise program very soon.  Her daughter was very quiet as we ate together, and after the meal found a corner in the church building to sit and read.  Her son was a ball of energy.  He wanted to play and had no-one to play with.  So I spent an hour or so throwing a ball around a large community room with him.  He seemed to really have a great time.  But having so much energy was taxing on his mother, who at times, demonstrated an abruptness with her son that showed the pervasive exhaustion that being homeless can cause.  I understood on a visceral level how this young woman craved someone to affirm her worth and dignity.  As she first entered the room for dinner, her depression weighed so heavily on her shoulders that she walked hunched over and her eyes were downcast.  After some time in conversation, with me, though it could have been anyone who would listen to her, her eyes brightened, her body seemed to gain some strength, and she eventually relaxed enough to lean against the table as we talked as if we had known each other for years.  

Sunday Service: A Hunger for Justice - October, 5th, 2014

A Hunger For Justice

Reverend Tom Capo

October 5, 2014

We affirm justice, equity, and compassion in human relations.  I’m going to ask you the same question I asked last month when we explored “Beloved Community.”  What does “affirm” really mean to us, individually and as a congregation? What does “affirm” really look like? Many of you do work in the community, or perhaps in your jobs, to help others, to fight injustice, to educate those who are unaware of the some of the human, animal, and ecological crises our world faces.  I know that many of you are yearning, hungry for justice, equity, and compassion in our world.

What does it mean really mean to be “hungry for justice?”  Are these just words we bandy about during coffee hour and snack after the service?  “Here, have some fair trade chocolate.”  “Thanks I am hungry for justice!”  Is it a personal question?  “I got detention because I was sitting next to the person who was disrupting class.  But it wasn’t me!  I was just sitting there!  It’s totally not fair and I’m going to get my parents to file a complaint!  I am hungry for justice!”  Or is it a different kind of personal question?  “I’ve read the Unitarian Universalist Association’s 2013-2014 Common Read Behind the Kitchen Door, about wage inequality and unfair working conditions in the majority of our nation’s restaurants.  I am hungry for justice and I’m going to do something about this.”

Sunday Service: Not Just I, Community is We - September 21st, 2014

Not just I, Community is We

Reverend Tom Capo

9/21/2014

A long long time ago

I can still remember how the music used to make me smile

And I knew if I had my chance

That I could make those people dance

And maybe the’d be happy for a while

But February made me shiver

With every paper I’d deliver

Bad news on the doorstep

I couldn’t take one more step

Great works of art, music included, ask the viewer or listener to bring a little of themselves into the experience.  Thus, the meaning of art or music is constantly shifting little, nuanced by whatever the viewer’s or listen’s life, wherever they are on their journey.  Don McLean, the writer and composer of “American Pie” never really talked about what he was trying to say when he wrote the song.  Many other people have attributed meaning to it.  Some say that McLean was talking about the turbulent 60’s, some that McLean was expressing regret over the death of the civil rights movement, some that McLean was bemoaning the death of danceable rock and roll music.  Some have written that McLean was grieving for what he perceived as the death of religion and other traditional ideas from his childhood.   Others have found what they believe to be references to rock musicians Buddy Holly,Janis Joplin, and the Beatles, civil rights leader Martin Luther King, Jr. and politicians President Jack Kennedy, and Senator Bobby Kennedy.  And we hear names in the song, including communist and socialist revolutionaries Vladimir Lenin, and Karl Marx, in addition to the Catholic Trinity, the father, son, and holy ghost, and actor James Dean.  What could this song have to do with beloved community?  So, how does “America Pie” speak to us about being in covenant with one another as a beloved community?

Sunday Service: How Do We Love Another - September 14th, 2014

How Do We Love One Another

9/14/2014

Reverend Tom Capo

I often use the phrase “Beloved Community.”  Do you wonder what I mean by that?  Have you ever asked yourself “how do I act if I am part of a beloved community?”  I’m curious about what each of us means by this term.  I believe we are all on the same page with community—a group of people gathered together for a purpose.  But what about beloved?  Are we talking about infatuation, puppy love, conditional love, parental love, soul-mate love, divine or spiritual love, patriotism (love of country), tough love, self-love?  No matter how many definitions or synonyms you might find—and there are a lot—chances are none of them completely captures the full meaning of love.

I have come to believe what the great psychoanalyst Erich Fromm says about love: “Love is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise. If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stay forever, when my act does not involve judgment and decision.”  In other words my friends, love is not a feeling.  Although it is so very easy to assume that it is.  Really, love causes a feeling; love is a decision you make, and decisions you continue to make, in order to create an experience that is described as love.  

Join us! 2014 Youth Religious Education Concert & Campfire!

Sunday Sermon: Ingathering Service & Water Communion - September 7th, 2014

Ingathering Service 2014

Water Communion

Reverend Tom Capo

Story--The Water Bearer's Garden  (Reverend Tom)

(From uu & me! Collected Stories, edited by Betsy Hill Williams; Boston: Skinner House, 2003). 

A water bearer in India had two large pots, each hung on one end of a pole that he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it. At the end of the long walk from the stream on the master's house, the cracked pot arrived only half full, while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water. For two years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water to his master's house.

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do. After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you."

"Why?" asked the bearer, "What are you ashamed of?"

"I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master's house.

Because of my flaws, you have to do all this work, and you don't get full value from our efforts," the pot said.

The water bearer felt sorry for the cracked pot, and in his compassion he said, "As we return to the master's house I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path."

Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it some. But at the end of the trail, it still felt sad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again the pot apologized to the bearer for its failure.

The bearer said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side? That's because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on our side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years I have been able to pick beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house.

"We all have our own unique flaws. We are all cracked pots. In the great web of life, nothing goes to waste. Don't be afraid of your flaws. Acknowledge them, and you too can be the cause of beauty. Know that in our weakness we find our strength.

Sunday Sermon: Where Are We Going - August 17th, 2014

“Where Are We Going” 

By Reverend Tom Capo

8/17/2014

Here is a future of Unitarian Universalism: Chalice Man and his Friend, the Flame, save people from fundamentalist beliefs and spread the message of Unitarian Universalism to all those in need of our free faith telling everyone that they meet about a faith home where people can responsibly search for truth and meaning without creeds or dogmas.

Actually, this probably isn’t the future of Unitarian Universalism.  But what is? 

Sunday Sermon: Who We Are (in Unitarian Universalism) Today - August 10th, 2014

“Who Are We (in Unitarian Universalism) Today”

By Reverend Tom Capo

August 10, 2014

The God of Abraham said to Moses: “I have observed the misery of my people who are in Egypt; I have heard their cry on account of their taskmasters. Indeed, I know their sufferings, and I have come down to deliver them from the Egyptians, and to bring them up out of that land to a good and broad land, a land flowing with milk and honey, to the country of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Amorites, the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites. The cry of the Israelites has now come to me; I have also seen how the Egyptians oppress them. So come, I will send you to Pharaoh to bring my people, the Israelites, out of Egypt.”

Now you might wonder why I started out with this excerpt from the Jewish Torah.  Well, to explain this, let me start with a little about myself.  I grew up Catholic and when I was in High School I realized that I no longer held the same beliefs as the other people in my church.  I did not believe that women shouldn’t use contraception; I didn’t believe that a woman shouldn’t have the right to choose whether to have a child or not; I no longer believed in the Trinity—a Father-God, Son-God, and Holy Spirit-God, all in one.  I found myself unable to participate in Communion or Confession; I could no longer even say the Lord’s Prayer.  I felt in exile from the faith of my childhood.  And I quickly realized that I would no longer fit in any Christological faith home.  I was in exile from all Christian churches, an exile that was imposed by myself, yes, but also imposed by churches that would only welcome me if I accepted and professed their dogma.

Summertime at DUUC!

Picnics, watermelon, bike rides, swimming, flip-flops,  BBQs, and popsicles.  We all look forward to different things in the summer!

Here at DuPage Unitarian Universalist Church (DUUC) we celebrate summer with our sermons, adventures together, activities on-site, and a change in our service schedule.

Starting this Sunday, June 15th, we will have one regular service at 10:00am.  Please mark your calendars for service:  SUNDAYS AT 10:00am

We just kicked off the summer with our annual BBQ, a pancake breakfast (see Chef Michael on our Facebook page) and have lots more fun planned!  Please join us this summer and add DUUC as one of your summertime pleasures!

Dates to remember as follows:

Sunday 6/15:  Sunday Service and Youth Religious Education @ 10:00am

Saturday 6/21:  Summer Solstice Celebration @ 4:00pm

Sunday 6/22:  June 22nd, 2014:  Sunday Service and Youth Religious Education @ 10:00am

Sunday 6/29:  Chicago Gay Pride Parade
(a group from DUUC will walk together in support of the LGBT community meeting at DUUC at 9:00am to carpool)

Sunday 6/29:  Sunday Service and Youth Religious Education @ 10:00am

Sunday 7/6:  Sunday Service and Youth Religious Education @ 10:00am

For more details on our service topics, or contact information for the above mentioned events, please check our our church newsletter HERE!